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Saturday, May 30, 2009

♥ Making A Memory

It's been a while.

&i still think of what we could've been,
if i knew how to love then.



I'm in love with an idiot=.=
i can't stop thinking of him, i can't stop loving him.
Yes, i daresay love.

I cry because i'm not enough.
I cry because i'm not strong.

And most of all,
I cry because you truly get to me.


So sick of life, EOYs are here. EOYs mann.
No joke.
I told mum&dad i'll give 80%, and 100% in S4.
Srsly.



5th day and i'm already this crazy.
It hurts like hell but i gotta try.
My ugly duckling.
Not perfect, not handsome, not smart,
but he's got a hold on my heart anyway.

I'm so dead...i need to get a grip.
I feel like just giving up,
but i can't.
It's not right...

I feel like i'm having mood swings?
...

i'm so emotional today...

waited for hours to talk to him...
he rather play his stupid soccer....
he's ill, so couldn't come online..
phone also tingji...

I'M GOING NUTS.
i have to like him from afar?
This is just pathetic, sad and depressing.
Sad, Sadder, Saddest...


&&i can't help but wonder,
do you mean it when you say it?

Do you even care?

Would you be there?

Or am i just some toy?

I trust you won't hurt me,
so please don't hurt me..

I'll admit i'm at my most vulnerable point.
wounds reopen,
tears won't stop flowing.
smiles vanish,
and i've lost myself once again..
like the day he left me.

why you gotta do me like that,
Sarah.
x.

I BLOGGED.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
1:52 PM
0 commented

Saturday, May 16, 2009

♥ 170509

the worst birthday ever.
or so it seems at this point.

total failure.

so not in the mood.

blogger blocked.

so pissed off.


swine flu slowly demolishing all the unlucky people of this earth.
if it reaches level 6 tmr and no one's allowed to go out,
i'll laugh and cry the whole day.

i'll whine and throw my tantrum like a kid.

had enough disappointment to last me a lifetime,
Sarah.
xoxo.

it's my birthday tmr dammit!
is it that hard to let me be happy??

fkthismove and the lies.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
12:13 PM
0 commented

Friday, May 15, 2009

♥ LOVE+

*names have been changed.


K: Give mickey mouse a chance.

L: Give Tweety bird a chance.


wtf.

they always do this.

what if it don't work out?

then i'm the one to blame again.

shut the hell up.

stop raising hopes.



i feel so dazed.

i'm so confused!

I'm so tired....

more crapping~




Do i take a step forward,

or have i crossed the line.

I can't stop thinking of you,

you're starting to always be on my mind.

It's reached the stage,

that i cannot fake.

You keep me coming back for more,

and this is more than i can take.

Can't stop wondering if we could be,

and if this time the feeling's real.

For i have been searching for so long,

to find someone that truly feels the way i feel.


Can you promise me,

that this isn't just another game.

Can you show me how you feel,

and not just tell me you feel the same.

Will you always be there,

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
4:56 PM
0 commented

Thursday, May 14, 2009

♥ oh pretty baby,

i 'd love you to love me,
i need you to need me,
i want you to want me.


yet, i know it's never happening.
ha.....

wtv.

Today's a tiring full dance rehearsal.
missed physics, english, pe and drama altogether.
meaning the whole day was just slacking, dancing, cam-whoring and walking around.

i am so damn tired.
have to finish math investigation.
bake.
and, i'm still blogging?

omg, bye~


i really want you,
Sarah.
xoxo.

but i'm not that desperate for you to love me back.
cos i'd rather the feelings be true.
than just you faking that you feel it too.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
5:00 PM
0 commented

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

♥ Crazy Beautiful,

"you're not going anywhere like i care, cos i've got used to it"

oh, you're crazy yet beautiful boy.

haha, but are you really that worth it?

don't think so.


i want to free fall into your arms, somewhere safe and warm.
cos i'm tired of staying in the cold all alone.
he doesn't know how much i want, just for him to realise.
that i'm not playing but looking for something real.

it's now that i finally learn how to love,
and also putting myself first.


One day I'll Find You
I'm waiting and yearning,
for someone to catch me as i'm falling.
With arms of security and love,
to depend on and trust.
A place to go to,
when all of life seems too cold.
To be able to forget all the pain,
and fall in love deeper and over again.
Someone to trust and go to,
that when i cry he'll hold me in his arms.
For all the things i long,
and you just keep playing in my head like a song.
The familiar warmth of love and security,
my one and only remedy.
Those feelings i desperately reach out for,
even as everyone watches as i fall.
I just want somewhere to runaway to,
a secret hideout for me and you.
One day i'll find you,
to lighten the shade of my sky so blue.
We'll escape this world full of hate,
to just love and leave the rest to fate.
I promise my heart,
trusting that you will never tear it apart.
So far and unreachable,
you make the pain less miserable.
All my tears that slowly fall,
for love i will give my all.
For i have learnt to love from the scars,
to be true and not look back to the past.
Would you believe me,
if i told you i just wanted to be free.
From all the anger and hurting,
just to turn it all into loving.
It's just that i'm tired of carrying,
the burden of the world and left alone bleeding.
I know it may seem that i'm not alone,
but everytime i fall it feels that i'm on my own.
I'm done with standing in the pouring rain,
shivering in the cold with nothing to gain.
When's it my turn,
for someone to rely on and not just watch me as i burn.
I'm just looking for someone real,
not just anybody to tell me they feel what i feel.
I've heard it a thousand times,
and telling me in the end i'll be fine.
We don't even know where this will go,
so how would we know.
Why does the world insist,
on believing in pretty words that don't even exist.
Saying words that just seem right,
when it's only leading you away from the light.
Would you be the one to truly understand,
and be there for me in the end.
I've shed enough tears,
and kept to myself so many fears.
Living a nightmare they call life,
with every new rejection cutting just like a knife.
To finally feel what i've been longing,
that strange irrational crazy feeling.
DONE~
le satisfaction baby~
after so long, finally something.
It's at least ok right?
If you understand, good for you.
though truth be told, i don't think you do.
ANYWAY.
school was....ok.
Chinese was alright.
PC was dumb.
History was boring.
Lunch was learning to be a light bulb.
Math was math retest.
Bio was a waste of time as usual.
So damn tired.
gotta do math investigation task soon...
tmr is rehearsal all the way i s'ppose.
heck of a day.
wow...and baking....too.
marvellous.
So drained.
satisfactory post i'd say.
clinging onto false hopes,
Sarah.
xoxo.
you've got 4 more days to wake up and surprise me.
yet, i know nothing's going to happen.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
5:03 PM
0 commented

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

♥ So Damn Clever,

today is a tiring day.
like every other boring day.

half an hour of math, rehearsal, missed boring maths, chem, practise, lunch, geog, practise, HOME.

practise for math retest.


oh, it was supposed to rain.
but because you haven't opened up your eyes,
it won't rain.

oh rain, oh open up your eyes already.

feel like having a sleepover on thursday.
nvm.
so damn tired.
sunday, so gone.
haha.
tomorrow.
omg....=.=

i've found you,
but i'm not the one you want.

i'm such a fool,
and it's all because of you.

i wish i could believe myself when i say i don't feel it anymore.

for could you be my remedy,
Sarah.
xoxo.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
4:55 PM
0 commented

Monday, May 11, 2009

♥ Lust

EVERYBODY knows what's going on.
almost everybody anyway.

english was english, what do you expect?
Lethargic day, lethargic everything.

Assembly, was ok and quite interesting at the end.
BRENNAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~~~
MYGORRRRRRRRRRR~~~
LOL, then was geog.
changed for PE, went to lab to "discuss" for the superawesomemagnificantcrazyprojthatnoonewantstodo.
Then my personal secrets were revealed.
ohnoiamsodead.
Weirdpig was doing survey, so yeah.

Then was PE, almost went into concussion!
YAY!~

Lunch, was a blur.

Physics was tiring, lethargic, restless, boring and uninteresting.
Chinese was fun, attempt to do the chinese speech thing, and ended up having illegal discussion.
w/brennaaaaaaaaa, pig and GJ about this weird korean book that was supposedly some guide to girls....how... sweet? LOL. &&they were saying about how good the book is...then the hornyweirdpig like...was...crazy about some joke....lol.

ANYWAY, bio...
what's to expect?
it's DWIGHT.
OMG, dwight's angels...=.=
so bio was ok.....

end of school, hallelujah~

thinking of doing something to my hair...a bit tired of it.

bday party? how to organise?
just dump everyone in that pond...
so frustrating.

omg, then the mygorr right..
haish.
and the weirdpig.

HAISH.so very confusing.
i am lost, astonished, happy and having mixed feelings.

like, this is the first time we talk so much?
or even talk to each other at all.
lol.

break throughssss.

17 May in 6days,
will you then finally wake up?

i want this post to be longgggggg. currently trying to find the energy to study for math test.
though, failing as you can see.
people aren't blogging. so boring.
i need a life outside of these four walls.
i don't like HIM.
i like IT.
get it?

infatuation, not love. yet, it still hurts.
oh, i don't want to do the #*$&*$&$%$ jaiho dance.
so messed up, srsly.

.
..
...
cos i need you,
Sarah.
xoxo.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
5:04 PM
0 commented

Sunday, May 10, 2009

♥ More Than Words

I Love You;
"what would you say, if i took those words away."

Yesterday was horror. Almost dropped dead.
Had to wake up at 8, go out from 9 and went home at 3.
Reached home at 4.
Dance practise; Jaiho.
4-8, dinner with Hansika, Vince, Mark, Ke You& Joy.
9plus- ciao~
9:30-11, msn, shower, talked to weird pig.
11: crash.

Today, woke up at 9, church, lunch at orang tiga again....
back home.

need to pracitse math sums and finish physics essay-Earthquakes.
Kept thinking about certain things.
Some that left me lost, some in tears.

Why is life so hard and lonely?
Why are guys so stubborn?
It's not love you're feeling, it's a strong feeling called infatuation.
I'm sorry,
you don't like me but what you want me to be.

I would've gone on and accepted you like last year, but it's different now.

I need someone real,
someone to understand.


Not just any other flings to pass time,
Sarah.
xoxo.

prove to me you really mean it,
&give me a chance to fall for you.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
2:46 PM
0 commented

Friday, May 08, 2009

♥ purple light,

so bored, so tired.
so damn annoyed.

i want to shake you till you wake up and open your eyes.

i want to cry.

stupid.


=.=


will you be the one to save me,
Sarah.
xoxo.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
5:18 PM
0 commented

Thursday, May 07, 2009

♥ Bitch Fit Much?

All those bloody s holes who think they know it all better fk off.


you don't know any of us.

therefore you should piss off.


get a life.


This is overrated.

and i think you're the cliche losers who think they're in love

and gonna die cos he doesn't like you back.


wtf, everybody goes through it.

grow up.

live with it.


so damn pissed.


i bet you don't even know the meaning of bimbotic and bitch.

faker?

gosh,

say it to our faces and not hide out in your blogs.


i could do this again,

i've done it before.

it's seriously no big.


if you really like him,

let go of him.

he is happy with HER.

HE chose HER.

because HE is happy with HER.

so go get a damn life and someone else.

There is nothing wrong with dating someone younger.

you narrowminded freaks.

is there a law that doesn not permit people to date anyone younger than them?

SRSLY?!!!!


open up your freaking eyes.

if you really like him so much,

be glad he is happy with her.


i really want to go and...

UGH.

NVM.


this is for the world to see,

Sarah.

xoxo.


don't judge, you don't even know a thing.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
9:07 PM
0 commented

♥ Desperately,

OHHHHHH,
DO THE JAIHO YO~

it's so infectious&contagious.

so dead tired(:
as usual. what's new?
baking later.

marshmellows went all out and really good. 400+ at least made today.

WELL DONE YO(:

how much more to go?

GOT HUGSSSS FROM ANDREW.M(:
ILY!!!!

&i stay there hopelessly waiting,
Sarah.
xoxo.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
4:50 PM
0 commented

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

♥ I Love You

he hired a PI, but still couldn't find out that for him i'd die.


I almost cried, thinking about you.
cos what we had was beautiful.

you taught me how to love.

even when i've moved on, i still can't walk away.

ANYWAY.

It's like everyone's infatuat-ing.
but me.

i'm like BLANK,
zilch, zero, NADA baby.

i just can't fall.
BUT. ANDREWcutestuff said he loves me.
He was like, "Sarah, love you"

SO MAJORLY OVERLY CUTE.

He is one adorable& lovable kid.

cupcakes went really well(:

doing marshmellows& lil' bit of cupcakes for tomorrow.
Gonna go bit of chem essay and finish tomorrow?

i take on more than i can handle sometimes.
but, i'm not the only one(:

***i saw him looking, stupid.
&i thought i killed all the birds that day.
HAHAHAH. nvm.

now, i like lions.
Andrew said he's one.
(:

ILYTANDREW.M(:


cos you're bittersweet& you knock me off my feet,
Sarah.
xoxox.

I Will Be, All That You Wanted.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
4:37 PM
0 commented

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

♥ Truth or Dare

let's play,
and i'll give you a free cupcake if i don't do it.

but it must be reasonable.

cupcakescupcakes yumyum cupcakes,
sarah's cupcakes rock.

lala~

"you make me wanna lala~"

i'm outta my mind,
but i'm just fine.


loveloveme,
Sarah.
xoxo.


but i'm too scared to love...

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
10:24 PM
0 commented

Monday, May 04, 2009

♥ Fool For Me

and like the song goes,

who likes who, doesn't matter if the rumor's true.
but the halls are filled with voices whispering.

I'm just too used of being judged and all that crap so wtv yeah?

i'm so tired!!!!
gotta bake again for them loves(:

chem, dinner, bake, CRASH.

ohhhh, today was eh-oh-kay satisfactory.

idk what i'm typing.


i try not to think of you,
Sarah.
xoxo.


yes Maureen, i love koreans(:
wanna know why?

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
4:37 PM
0 commented

Sunday, May 03, 2009

♥ Thinking of You

Woke up, showered.
ate.
took beloved phone back.
sms-ed whole day.

went to order cakes for 18th.
no candles. no song.
just eating.

tungsten-carbon asked me to bake at 4 today,
i did.
100 cupcakes.
it's small but lots of love and effort.

filled with chocs and sugar.

le magnific i would say.

can't really remember much of today.
was raelly fast and in a blur.

broke down, for the wtv time...
but i'm better.


sing me a song of all the things you long,
Sarah.
xoxo.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
8:19 PM
0 commented

Saturday, May 02, 2009

♥ Need For You

cheesy much.

hahahha.

i need more days like these. well, nights.
It's fun, simple and refreshing.
Except the phone taking, and tedious baking.
IT'S ALL GONE(:

&maybe you'll fall for me.
cos this time i'm not going to be chasing.

i'll bring you up,
and we'll see how it goes.

maybe we'll be.
maybe we won't.


stupid cow has my phone=.=




so simple,
Sarah.
xoxoxxx.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
9:58 PM
0 commented

Friday, May 01, 2009

♥ Hidden

"and if you asked me if i love him, i'd lie"


Today i WENT OUT.

Yeah, i finally went out to like just let go?
Well, it was refreshing.
Brennaaaaaaaaa&Mark came, sent Aaron to see his girlf's house.
Went to Metro, Watsons, ate, KTV, Roxy, Uniqlo, LaSenza, Starbucks, Potato&Co, Nici, JUICY COUTURE&then home.

Dinner, computer, chatting.

ZONKED.

that's bout it yeah.
tomorrow's also gonna be a heck of a day.


maybe one day i won't be invinsible to you anymore.
&then i wouldn't have to waste my time.

thinking of you,
but knowing we will never come through.


why must dreaming be so different,
Sarah.
xoxo.

♥ And did I tell you that I love you tonight
9:22 PM
0 commented

♥ Blissed Lover ;

    Sarah
    Dancer
    Taurus
    Lover&Loved

♥ LOVE messages


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